And Papa Never Had to Sit Through *Cats*

It was fashionable among his friends to disparage Conrad, [Hemingway] said ... [m]ost of the people he knew agreed that Conrad was a bad writer and T. S. Eliot a good one, but he disagreed: "If I knew that by grinding Mr. Eliot into a fine dry powder and sprinkling that powder over Mr. Conrad's grave Mr. Conrad would shortly appear ... I would leave for London early tomorrow morning with a sausage grinder."

--From Hemingway: a Life without Consequences, by James R. Mellow